@HollySaxby Part 4
I did buy a Bible which appealed to me in a bookshop: a ‘Living Bible’.

My parents had the highest expectations for me, but it wasn’t matched with support, and I was forced by the school into the wrong A-levels. I didn’t get the results I was hoping for, and after a year off earning and touring Australia for 6 months, I was finally ready to go off to Warwick University. As I left the house, my mother said “You know, Nigel, if you had really bothered to work at school you could have been going to Oxford or Cambridge now.”

The shame crashed in on me, destroying the excitement and confidence I had of starting a new chapter of my life. I was being told that yet again I was a disappointment. I think it was from that point that I came to believe that I would always be a disappointment. That I could do nothing but let everyone down: my parents, myself, and of course by extension my Lord and anyone else I might love in the future. I lost the confidence for anything.